Are You a Role Model Kids Can Look Up To?

Children watch movies and cartoons, relishing the role of the hero, the important one, because the hero is omnipotent. How many parents think they are omnipotent? Children think their parents are because, to a young child, the parent is EVERYTHING. Parents are the source for love, attention, physical care, shelter, food, clothing, teaching and help to overcome all those hurdles that being small creates. Parents are the wise ones, those who know everything and can fix everything. Because parents love the child, the child wants to grow up to be just like them, their hero.

Harry Chapin recorded the song, "The Cat's in the Cradle", which tells about the father-son relationship of a boy as he grows up and becomes an adult. The child seeks the father's attention, but the father is always working, focused on his life, putting his son and his son's desires for fatherly attention last. The end of the song is when the father is elderly and the son is independent, working hard for his livelihood. The father finally has reached the point when he realizes he has missed his son's childhood and wants to spend time with him. Unfortunately, the son has grown up to be just like dad: We'll get together then, dad, we'll get together soon.

Yes, the role model for being independent, responsible, providing for your family and having a life of your own (separate from the children) are values important that children learn and aspire to; how else will they become self-sufficient and responsible adults? Yet there must be a balance in those values and the ones where adults value the child, letting him/her be the center of the adult's world through communication and dedicated support for the child's interests and achievements.

Are You a Role Model Kids Can Look Up To?

Children learn from parents, both positively and negatively. When parents support each other (emotionally and mentally) by providing good role models, they offer their children behaviors and attitudes for them to follow in the same path of success and accomplishments, no matter how small they may be. The children learn to cooperate and collaborate with others, to support others and be valued by others. These will be children who grow up to be valued employees, team players, and ideal role models for others.

When parents attack each other and/or the children, the children learn survival skills of needing to be the best, strongest, meanest or other attributes for their physical, mental and emotional survival, often at the expense of others. These children often grow up to be aggressive, hostile, impatient or intolerant of others whom they may ridicule in order to feel better about themselves. These children often become the difficult-to-manage employee, the marginally accepted individual who has few friends and opportunities in life. They have families where they continue the same patterns of behavior they learned.

Children learn from their parents who are the first and longest teachers in their lives. Parents show the children how to manage conflict and responsibilities, solve problems, set goals and make decisions, and live appropriately in society. Parents teach children how to juggle life's challenges throughout the decades of our lives. Parents are the primary teachers and they teach every day, all day long, by example. What example are you being for your child?

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